More Than Just A Memory
by Language Nerd
Summary: Kensi can't find what she's looking for and Deeks makes fun of her for being messy. But what happens when he decides to help her and she revisits more from her past than she was planning on? Set only slightly in the future hopefully. One-shot.


This is something I came up with a few months ago and have been working on when I had time. If you know me from my other story, you know how slow I write and piece everything together, I just kept adding things as they came up in my mind so this took a long time to finish. I've put a lot of thought and research into it so I hope it's correct. It's set somewhere in the very near future (I hope). Please ncisla give us a Densi wedding this season! :)

 _Italics indicate the past._ One-shot for now ;)

Author's note is at the bottom so I don't give anything away.

Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS:LA.

* * *

Deeks entered the house and yelled out. "Kens, I'm home!" He didn't get a response so he decided to go upstairs. He walked into the bedroom and saw her sorting through boxes obviously determined to find something. "What have you lost?" Deeks asked amused.

"Nothing." She replied quickly as she continued looking through several boxes that were on their bed. He took a seat next to the boxes and peeked in one of them.

"It doesn't look like nothing. Maybe if you actually cleaned up your stuff once in a whi…"

"I don't need a lecture right now, Deeks." Her voice was harsh.

"What are you looking for?" He could tell she was serious.

"A necklace my father gave me. It's always been in this box and now I can't find it." She decided to tell him.

"Would you have taken it out for any reason?"

"No Deeks, then I wouldn't be looking for it in here because I would remember where I had put it." She was really angry.

"Kens, calm down. It's gonna be okay." He said calmly.

"I can't calm down. It's not going to be okay. The wedding is a week away." She was pacing hysterically at this point. He grabbed a hold of her hand and she broke down in tears. The stress of the upcoming wedding combined with her current frustrations were just too much. He pulled her over to sit next to him on the bed and rubbed circles on her back, seeming to calm her down a little bit. She had her eyes closed and he knew how hard this whole wedding had been for her emotions. The fact that her father wasn't going to be there made it even harder.

She then started to speak. "He gave it to me on my fifteenth birthday, said he'd had it since before I was born and I never wear it because I'm so afraid to lose it but I wanted to wear it on our wedding day… it makes me feel like he's with me." She admitted softly.

"Kens, you don't need a necklace to know that he's always gonna be with you, especially on our wedding day." A fresh wave of tears came.

"Why can't I ever just keep something organized? It's so frustrating." He knew she had trouble getting rid of her things and cleaning up. He would joke about it sometimes but he couldn't stand to see her beat herself up about it.

"Why don't we get some new boxes and take everything out of these boxes, open every little section and pocket in here?"

"Okay." She nodded in agreement so they got started.

There were t-shirts, sweatshirts, smaller boxes filled with small items, books, birthday cards, more of her Dad's medals that hadn't been framed and notebooks filled with his writing. He opened a box that had all types of little knick-knacks in it and found a necklace. "Is this it?" He held it out for her to see.

She looked over. "No."

Another box had mostly her childhood things in it. There were toys, pieces of art and children's storybooks. There was a stack of journals with different years on them and another box filled with vhs tapes from every life event. "Do you still have a vhs player?" He said holding up the tapes.

"Yeah, I do somewhere?" Looking back at the closet, she walked over. He was amazed at the things she kept.

"We should try to digitize all of these. That way you won't lose them if they get damaged."

"Yeah, that's a good idea."

"Kensi's 8th birthday." Deeks read out loud. "Camping, Kensi's school show 1993, Christmas 1996, Halloween 1995."

She found the player and laid it on the bed, going straight back to looking through all the boxes.

He moved the tapes into another box one by one looking for a necklace hidden between them but he wasn't seeing anything. He got distracted looking at all the titles of important events from his very soon-to-be wife's life.

He looked over at her, still busily searching for the necklace. "I think we should take a break and watch some of these." He held up some vhs tapes again.

She let out a big sigh. "Sure." She was starting to lose hope that they would find it.

* * *

Deeks had hooked the vhs player up to the tv. They got some drinks and seated themselves on the couch. He had put in the tape that said, 'Kensi's 8th birthday' and it started right away.

 _There were children seated all around the table with Kensi at the end wearing a birthday hat._

" _Kensi is 8 years old today." A man's voice said. Julia carried a big cake into the dining room with the candles already lit and placed it in front of her carefully._

" _Is everyone ready to sing?" There were some 'yes's' so she started them off. "Happy…"_

" _Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Kensi, happy birthday to you!" The whole group sang in unison._

" _Blow out the candles and make a wish." She did as she was told and everyone cheered._

"My father's the one filming." She told Deeks because he'd never heard her Dad's voice. "And that's Tiffany." She pointed to a blond girl sitting next to her.

"Kat-Mindy-Mandy-Tiffany-and-Tiffany Tiffany?" He clarified.

She laughed at the way he always had to say their names. "Mhm, she was one of my best friends even back then."

 _Her father walked over to stand next to her. "Kensi, what was your wish?"_

" _I'm not telling you Daddy, then it won't come true." Her little voice said._

 _He laughed. "Alright, baby girl."_

" _Who's ready for some cake?" Julia shouted cheerfully._

" _Me!" All the children responded with great joy._

Deeks smiled when the video ended. He wasn't used to seeing her so free of worry. Seeing his fiancé as a little girl made him love her even more than he thought was possible. He thought the video was done but it continued with a completely new setting.

" _Mommy look I caught a fish." Kensi held up the fish and had the biggest smile on her face._

" _Wow, that's great baby." Kensi beamed at the compliment. "How's your Dad doing?" She moved over to Donald who was still busy fishing._

" _He hasn't caught one yet, but my line did."_

" _That's fantastic, sweetheart." They walked over to Donald._

" _How's it going Don?"_

" _It's coming along, did you see Kensi's fish?" His voice obviously proud._

" _Of course I did."_

" _Are you excited for you our dinner tonight?" He said playfully._

" _No." She did not sound pleased. "I will try one bite of the fish and then I'll eat my own food."_

" _You have to try my fish." Kensi insisted holding up her fish again._

" _I will."_

" _Come on Julia, this is outdoor living. We're in the wilderness."_

" _Oh I'm aware."_

"This was the one and only time my Mom came camping with us. After that, it was just a father-daughter thing." She laughed at the memories. "She did not like being submerged in nature but I love it."

She'd talked to him about camping many times. When they had the case in the woods and they were going to stay in a camper bus, she was so excited. He could tell that she was disappointed when the case didn't last overnight. "Maybe we can go camping sometime. Not a tent though but we can get a caravan."

"I'd like that."

 _They had built a nice campfire and were roasting marshmallows. Donald zoomed in on the two of them. Julia was sitting on a log and Kensi was standing in front of her as she held her stick with a marshmallow on it above the fire. They were talking but it wasn't audible with the sound of the wood crackling as it burned._

" _What are you guys doing?" He asked as if it wasn't already obvious enough._

" _We're roasting marshmallows." Kensi said as she concentrated on the task._

" _I think it's good Kens." She turned with the stick and her mother looked at it._

" _You like your marshmallows don't you?"_

" _I love them." She jumped up and down as Julia was taking the marshmallow off the stick and putting it between graham crackers. Kensi started eating her s'more right away as Julia put a new marshmallow on the stick._

 _He came closer to them. "How's it taste, Kens?"_

" _Really good." She was enjoying it very much because she had some chocolate in the corners of her mouth. He just focused on her as she concentrated on the stick Julia was holding above the fire. Once she had the last bite of her s'more, she took over the stick from Julia and waited for it to finish._

"Still a sa-'more lover."

"It's not sa-'more, it's s'more."

"Same difference." He brushed off and she just shook her head with laughter.

 _Donald was now sitting on a log and playing the harmonica. Kensi was sitting next to him and watching as he played a song. She leaned her head against his arm and he paused smiling down at her before taking another breath and continuing. When he finished he handed the harmonica to Kensi. "You wanna try."_

" _I can't do it."_

" _Oh, of course you can. Come on." He put the harmonica in her hands and helped her set her fingers in the correct places. She lifted the harmonica to her mouth and made a nice sound. "There you go."_

" _Hah, that's cool." She looked at the person behind the camera._

" _Now go here." He moved her fingers to different spots. She made another sound that didn't sound as pleasant and she pulled back making a face._

" _Kens." Julia's voice said from off camera and she laughed about it._

" _This is so hard. I can't do it."_

" _Hey." He got back her attention. "Never give up on something just because it doesn't work out the first time."_

 _She looked at him when she heard his serious tone. "Okay."_

The video ended and as Deeks walked over to put another one in, he thought about what Donald had said. She lived by his words, she never gave up when it didn't work out the first time. She always found a way to fix, help or get things done. If she was told no she would find another way around it. Even their relationship had had a rocky start but she wanted to be bold and she made it happen. He pressed the button on the remote so that the new tape started up.

 _Donald was sitting on the couch reading a newspaper and Julia was sitting in an armchair reading a magazine._

 _There were giggles from whoever was holding the camera and Donald looked over._

" _Are you filming us baby girl?" He asked with a smile._

 _She erupted in an even bigger fit of giggles causing the camera to shake._

" _What do you see?"_

" _Mama and Daddy." She walked over and got way too close to her Dad's face. The camera moved again and focused on Julia._

" _See we have to hold it still so we can see how Mama concentrates on her magazine. Reading an interesting article, she doesn't even hear us." He helped her steady the camera. "We see here a Mama bear in her natural habitat." His voice changed completely as he said it, Julia couldn't keep her laugh in any longer and Kensi joined in. Julia turned back to her magazine and continued to read. Donald whispered to Kensi. "I think you should go make her laugh again."_

 _Kensi agreed and walked over to Julia, her first appearance on this video. She looked about three years old and was wearing leggings, a t-shirt and her hair in two little pigtails. She sweetly looked at her Mom but then moved her arms up and started tickling her. Julia scooped her up and countered by kissing her over and over again._

 _Once she stilled they were looking at each other. "Lub you."_

" _I love you too, sweetheart."_

Now in a different place.

" _Where is Kensi?" Donald said with false suspicion as he walked through the hallway into the master-bedroom._

 _He chuckled at what he saw. "Wow you look beautiful, baby girl." She looked slightly guilty when she saw him. She was fully decked in dress-up clothes with Julia's jewelry, makeup and heels that were much too big. "Julia, come here!"_

 _Moments later, he turned to see Julia walking down the hall and caught her reaction as she saw what was going on. She could hardly keep in the laugh as she looked at Kensi's fashion choices. "Kens, you look so pretty. Did you you do your own makeup?" The amusement evident because Kensi's face had lipstick everywhere._

 _Kensi nodded and walked into her Mother's arms. Julia lifted her up and stood right in front of the camera. She waved and Kensi copied her._

" _I'm going to show you this when you grow up." He sounded so enthusiastic. "Maybe even at your wedding."_

He looked over to her as she just stared at the tv screen. She was quiet and he knew that it was hard hearing his words, he was never going to see her in her wedding dress, walk her down the aisle or get to show everyone an embarrassing video at the reception.

 _Donald and Kensi were sitting on the couch and looked at each other and giggled._

" _Who's this?" He pointed towards the baby doll in her hand._

" _Is Pete."_

" _Pete?" He laughed._

" _Yes, is his name." She was leaving out some words._

" _She named him Pete after the neighbor's dog." Julia made clear._

" _I his Mama."_

" _Is that so?"_

" _Mhm."_

" _Do you take good care of him?"_

" _O'course. I gonna be da best Mama."_

" _I'm sure you will." He kissed the top of her head. "But it's hard being a parent sometimes."_

" _Na-a." She shook her head._

" _Yeah-a. It is. We take care of you, feed you, change your diaper. It's a lot of work."_

" _I not do that for Pete."_

" _He doesn't need all that, does he?"_

" _No." She shook her head again._

" _Being a parent is also very rewarding though. We do lots of fun things together." She listened attentively still holding Pete in her arms. "We laugh all the time, you help me fix things, help me make dinner, we have adventures and we love each other a lot." She wrapped her arms around him. "Love you baby girl."_

" _Lub you Daddy." After a moment she started to move to get off the couch._

" _Where are you going?"_

" _Pete's bedtime!" She said enthusiastically._

" _You go put him to bed and then we'll have dinner."_

" _Okay!" She shouted running out of the room._

" _That was such a sweet moment. We shou…"_

Even at that young age Deeks could see that she had attitude.

 _Kensi was walking into her room with Julia following. "This is our bedtime routine. Kensi's got her jammies on, Mama's got her jammies on and Daddy's got his jammies on."_

He faced the camera down at his own legs showing the plaid pants he was wearing. Kensi had no idea who he was saying or filming this all for. Maybe to show her grandparents or maybe just to document her life to watch when she was older.

" _Go pick out a book to read." Julia said as she took a seat on the small couch in Kensi's room._

 _Kensi went over to the bookshelf and didn't take very long to decide. She came back over and handed the book to Julia. "Good choice." She held up the book for Donald to film to show the cover. "Yonder Tales, this is one of our favorites. We pick it almost every night." She informed, slightly amused._

 _Kensi climbed up onto the couch and then seated herself in her mother's lap._

" _Once upon a time…"_

" _Once pon da time." Kensi said simultaneously with her Mom._

" _...there was a young knight who lived in a small village…" Julia went on telling an elaborate tale about the knight and a woman in a faraway land. Kensi occasionally stepped in and said the words with Julia or commented while pointing at the pictures._

Deeks thought it was the cutest thing. His ladybird seemingly knew all the words to the tale even though he assumed she couldn't read yet. It proved just how many times they'd read this story before and he was surprised that Kensi enjoyed the traditional boy-saves-girl type of theme, but then again she was only about three years old.

 _Julia continued to read until Donald pointed out the huge yawn Kensi let out. "Baby girl's getting tired." He moved some of her hair back out of her face._

" _I not."_

" _You're not?"_

" _No." She shook her head adamantly._

" _Alright."_

" _The tale is almost done." Julia checked how many pages were left and then started up again. When they got to the last page, Kensi was still very much awake only she'd quieted down a little. "Say the last words." Julia prompted her._

" _Dey lib happy-dee eva after. Dee end."_

" _The end. Yay!" Julia closed the book and laid it aside. She kissed Kensi's cheek. "Time for bed."_

" _I no tired."_

" _No?" She shook her head. "I think we should try to sleep."_

" _No." She whined._

The filming stopped just as Kensi was getting fussy and continued at what looked like a later moment.

 _The room was dark, a nightlight giving the only source of light. Kensi was in Julia's arms clutching onto her as she was being rocked back and forth softly and whispered to in her ear._

" _Our little Kensi doesn't want to go to sleep." Julia smiled and turned so that Kensi's face was looking at the camera. She had red eyes and tear-stained cheeks from crying. She'd stopped crying but there were still little sniffles._

 _The glare she was giving the camera made him laugh softly. She eventually turned her head so she was cuddled into Julia's neck and Julia tried to reassure her. "You're okay. I'm going to stay here until you fall asleep."_

 _Deciding that her head was more comfortable facing outward, she turned to look at her Dad again. The sniffles had stopped as she watched him for a few moments and then let out a huge yawn. Her eyes were starting to droop slightly but she kept her gaze on her father. Julia turned slowly and whispered. "Is she asleep?"_

 _He walked over to look at her face and saw her eyes shut. "Yeah."_

 _Julia carried Kensi across the room. "She's getting too big for the crib." She said as she lowered Kensi down in her bed._

 _He zoomed in on her little face. She was finally sleeping after what seemed like hours. "My stubborn baby girl. Never wants to go to sleep."_

" _Look at that face." Julia laid a little teddy bear next to Kensi and just looked at her._

" _She's the sweetest."_

The video setting changed.

 _Kensi was standing on a chair at the kitchen counter with utensils and ingredients in front of her. "What day is it today, baby girl?"_

" _Mama's Day."_

" _That's right, it's Mother's Day and what are we doing?"_

" _Makin' bweakfast." She pointed to the food._

" _Oh yeah, we're making a special breakfast for Mommy. Some scrambled eggs, toast and donuts." He focused on the box of six donuts._

"I hope you're Dad made the breakfast, cause I can't imagine little Kensi being a better cook back then, than now."

"With some help I can actually cook."

"By help you mean watch the other person cook and you eat the ingredients." She glared at him for a second and then turned her attention to the tv again.

 _Kensi entered the bedroom first and Julia was laying in bed. She was obviously pretending to be asleep, waiting for Kensi to wake her up. Kensi put the glass of orange juice on the nightstand and held a flower and card in front of her mother's face. All of a sudden Julia wrapped her arms around her and she let out a surprised scream that then resulted in a contagious laugh. She was flailing to be let go but Julia was giving her kisses. Finally calming down, Julia looked at Donald._

" _Oh Don, don't film me." She laughed embarrassed and covered her face with her hands. "I don't look good."_

" _You always look beautiful sweetheart."_

" _Is this for me?" Julia asked as Kensi pushed a card into her hands._

 _Kensi nodded eagerly for her to open it. There were lots of colors and drawings on the card, stick-figure people made with lots of thought and love._

" _Who is everyone Kens?" Donald asked so she could point them out._

" _Is Mama, me and Daddy. Aw fam-ly."_

" _Our family." She repeated saying it correctly._

" _And hearts." Kensi said pointing at multiple red blobs._

" _I love it Kensi, thank you so much. Gimme a kiss." She did so and then turned to her Dad expectedly. "Did you make me breakfast?"_

" _Yes, we did." He gave her the plate._

" _This looks delicious, thank you. You want a piece of my donut?" She offered to Kensi who nodded promptly._

" _Oh Kens, you've already eaten a whole donut." Her Dad said._

 _Kensi looked guilty. "It's okay, it's a special day." Her Mom whispered._

"This is amazing." Deeks was laughing so hard.

"Stop." She pushed his shoulder away slightly.

"You were so cute Kens." She seemed embarrassed. "You still are." She still didn't speak. "It's crazy to see you that young. Baby Kensi." He was amazed.

"I know. It's really weird."

He read some more of the titles on the vhs tapes and then decided on a video of Kensi when she was a lot older.

 _Kensi was standing in a stable next to a horse when her Dad asked a question. "Is this the one?"_

" _Yep. This is Chester." She pet the horse. "He's my favorite one to ride so hopefully tomorrow will go well."_

" _I'm sure you guys will do great." He pet Chester's head. She was fiddling around with some equipment that was on the side._

" _So what do you have to do now to prepare?"_

" _I'm going to use this brush." She held it up. "And brush him, make sure he looks good. He can use the attention and make him feel special."_

" _He needs to be show ready." He stated._

" _Exactly. We both need to look good when we win." She smiled._

 _Donald laughed. "I hope you do sweetheart."_

The setting of the video changed to outside and to what Deeks assumed was the next day.

 _Kensi was standing on the outside of the ring wearing her outfit with tall boots, breeches, a black coat and a helmet. She looked slightly nervous watching the other girl finish. She got up onto her horse and waited._

" _Currently in first place. That was number 22, Jessica Peters with horse Russell." The woman announced over the speaker. "Next we have number 23, Kensi Blye riding horse Chester." She was sitting on Chester and they entered the arena as someone opened the gate._

" _Are you filming?"_

" _I think so." There was fumbling with the camera._

" _Don, you have to capture this." Kensi was riding in circles, getting a feel for it._

" _I am, it's on." He confirmed._

 _There was a countdown and then she started. She got her speed up and swiftly jumped over the first obstacle._

" _Let's go Kens!" He cheered and she jumped over another one._

" _Good job, Kensi!" Her Mom's voice shouted._

 _She rode and leaped over many more obstacles in a set pattern and didn't knock any of them off. She was going swiftly until she got to the last one and it wobbled a bit. It didn't fall off though and she looked back to make sure. They slowed down and waited to hear the result._

" _That was number 23, Kensi Blye riding horse Chester now in second place… " The announcement was._

" _What'd she get?" Donald asked._

" _Second, but there's four more people, she could get bumped down out of the winnings."_

" _Her time is pretty good though."_

" _We'll see."_

"I knew you had ridden a horse but I didn't know you did competitions."

"It was only for a short while but it was fun."

"That's cool."

"I was pretty good if I do say so myself."

"You're good at everything you do, except maybe cooking, cleaning…"

"Alright I get it." She jumped in. "My Mom still has all my ribbons."

"Really?"

"Yeah, it's in the cupboard in the corner with some of my childhood photos."

"Oh I've looked at those but I didn't know they were yours."

"So much for being a detective."

"I don't need to be vigilant when I'm having dinner with my future mother in law."

"You should always be on your game no matter the circumstance."

"But they were special circumstances. I was trying to impress my girlfriend's mother, I was nervous."

"Oh please, she's loved you since the moment you guys met."

"That is quite possibly the truth." He then remembered something. "I get it now. You wanna get a horse and ride it on the beaches of Bali." He knew it was on her bucket list.

"Exactly. I love horses." They turned back to the screen when she saw it was her turn.

" _Second place goes to Kensi Blye who rode Chester." She stepped up onto the second place spot on the podium and someone gave her a ribbon and bouquet of flowers. The crowd applauded her and she smiled towards her parents._

 _She approached them after the award ceremony. "Congratulations."_

" _Congrats Kens."_

" _Thank you." She was very quiet after that._

" _Are you disappointed?"_

" _No." She looked down at her ribbon. "Just a little disappointed that we hit the last obstacle."_

" _I know, that's my little perfectionist."_

" _It wouldn't have mattered anyways but…"_

" _I get it, but second place is fantastic Kens. Out of 27 people, that's great. I'm so proud of you."_

" _Thanks." She smiled sincerely._

" _Alright, how 'bout we have a celebratory meal?"_

 _She finally perked up. "Can we get burgers?"_

 _He chuckled. "Sure."_

"Ah my little food lover." Deeks said.

"I sound like such a brat."

"You're just competitive."

"I still hate it when things are just not right."

"You've always been a perfectionist."

"Yep."

 _Kensi and her Dad were standing at the airport, a small airplane behind them._

" _Do you have to go?" She said sadly._

" _I do." He said matching her solemn tone. "I'm going to miss you so much." He wrapped his arms around her._

" _I'm going to miss you too." Her voice on the verge of tears._

" _But I'll be back before you know it and in the meantime I need you to do something for me okay?" He pulled back and got something out of his coat pocket._

" _Anything."_

 _He handed her a little box and she opened it. "It's my Meritorious Service medal."_

" _You want me to look after it?"_

" _Mhm. You know this is something very special of mine and you are my most special little girl so who better to keep it for me?"_

" _I can do it."_

" _Good." Kensi was looking inside the little box which had a note with it. "You read that later, okay?" She nodded her head and he looked back at the plane. "I really have to go now."_

 _He gave Kensi a hug and then walked over to Julia where the camera shifted, facing the ground._

" _I love you Julia."_

" _Love you too. Come home soon Don. Be safe." She whispered with emotion in her voice._

" _I will." He said softly. "Alright, one last hug baby girl." She was wrapped in his arms when the camera focused on them. "Don't cry sweetheart, I'll be back very soon." He held her face in his hands and then kissed her forehead. "I love you."_

" _Love you." She could barely utter._

 _Kensi came over to Julia now off camera as well. Donald was walking towards the airplane joined by other men in his group. "I know it's hard." Julia reassured Kensi._

 _There was a sob. "I don't want him to leave."_

" _I know. Shh..." Donald turned around just as he was about to board the plane and waved one last time and then he was gone._

She wiped a tear away but Deeks didn't comment on it. He just focused on the screen again as it continued.

" _Hi Don, by the time you get this it won't be Halloween anymore but I wanted you to see this." She walked into the front entrance. "Kensi!" She called upstairs._

" _Coming." A faint voice called back._

" _You know how she can be sometimes Don." The camera now facing the living room._

" _Alright let me see your costume Kens." Her Mom said as she came down the stairs._

 _She turned from side to side showing it off. "Wait I have to put my mask on."_

" _Which one are you again?"_

 _She rolled her eyes. "I'm Leonardo." She got the mask and put it on, looking like one of the Ninja Turtles._

" _How am I supposed to know that?"_

 _Kensi laughed and spoke with a muffled voice with the mask in the way. "Mom, everyone's going as this, it's the thing to do this year."_

" _If you say so." Kensi pulled the mask off again and looked at herself in the mirror. "You look great Kens. Is there a reason you're nervous?"_

" _I'm not nervous." She said quickly._

" _A boy perhaps?"_

" _Mom!" She was getting flustered._

" _Tell me what you're doing."_

" _I'm going to a Halloween party."_

" _The one Jonathan is going to?" Her voice sounding very suspicious._

" _Mom! I'm going with my friends."_

" _Alright, it's just that I talked to Debra, Jonathan's mother." She clarified. "She said he was going to be there."_

 _Kensi gave her signature eye-roll again. "Ugh."_

 _Julia laughed at Kensi's embarrassed look. "Say hi to your Dad."_

" _Hi Dad." She spoke straight into the camera and waved. "I miss you."_

" _Yes, we miss you so much Don. Come home soon."_

"Who was this Jonathan guy?"

"Jealous of a thirteen year old Deeks?" She was amused.

"Of course not but I think since I'm marrying you next week I should know about all your exes."

"You don't even know if we dated."

"Well did you?"

She didn't answer for a moment but then she looked away. "Maybe."

"Oh really what a surprise." His voice dripping with sarcasm.

She was trying very hard not to laugh. "It wasn't serious or anything but… he was my first kiss." She admitted.

"At thirteen?"

"No a couple years later, I was fifteen."

"Little Kensi. Quite the romantic." He was teasing her now. "Was it super awkward? I bet it was."

"Oh my God." She put her hands over her face, feeling like the thirteen year old being questioned by her Mom.

"Don't be embarrassed." He pulled her hands away so he could look her in the eye. "My first kiss was super awkward too." Sensing she wasn't going to give any more details, he pressed the button on the remote and it started again.

" _Kensi's skating." Julia said as she focused on a figure coming closer to her. Kensi was going around the rink holding on to the edge._

 _As she got closer it became clear that she was struggling to keep upright. "How's it going, Kens?"_

" _This is really hard." She wobbled a little._

" _Have you let go of the side yet?" Kensi came to stop in front of her, taking a break._

" _No, I almost fell stepping onto the ice to reach the side."_

" _You'll get better with practice."_

" _It's going to take a lot of practice if I want to actually skate."_

" _We'll have to come back here sometime."_

" _I'm going to go around the rink again."_

" _Okay sweetheart. You do that."_

" _Look at her Don." She chuckled. "She's trying."_

Kensi laughed at her Mom's fake vote of confidence, she probably never thought Kensi would hear her say that.

"At least we know you've improved a little since then." It was true she had gotten better but she still didn't feel confident on the ice.

 _Kensi was sleeping in her bed. "Kensi. It's time to get up." Julia rubbed small circles on her back and with a very cheery voice she said. "Merry Christmas."_

 _That woke Kensi up incredibly fast, she sat up right away and looked very happy. She had on her red christmas pj's and her hair was a bit of a mess. Julia chuckled at her daughter's sudden change from sleepy to awake._

" _Can we go downstairs?" Kensi asked eager to see the presents._

" _Of course." Julia walked down the stairs and once she got there she turned to see Kensi's reaction._

 _Kensi's face lit up brightly with excitement when she saw the presents under the tree but then turned to shock. "Daddy?!" She ran as fast as she could and jumped into his arms. Her attention was the furthest away from the presents now._

" _Hi, baby girl." He kissed the top of her head. "I missed you so much."_

" _I missed you too." Her voice wavering._

" _Oh baby, you're crying." Julia stated with sympathy in her voice._

" _I'm just so happy." Her voice muffled against her Dad's shoulder. She hadn't seen him in so long. "When did you get here?"_

" _A few hours ago."_

" _Really?" She pulled back to look at his face and he wiped her tears away with his thumb._

" _I came home as fast as I could and I got you something, an early christmas present cause we'll have to wait to open the rest until after breakfast." He got a little box the size of an orange out of his bag and handed it to her. She opened it happily and pulled out a set of jelly bracelets. "They're from Tokyo. I saw them and thought you would like them."_

" _I do, thanks Dad." She hugged him again and put them on her wrist._

" _Your welcome sweetheart. Now let's have breakfast."_

" _I have…"_

Julia's voice cut off abruptly and the camera ended facing the ground. "I saw those jelly bracelets in the box today, but you have way more of them now."

She nodded. "He got some for me everytime he went back."

The video continued outside. Julia was sitting across from the camera of which Deeks assumed Donald was using and Kensi was behind her in the background.

"It's a beautiful day, we just had lunch and are now relaxing. Kensi's busy climbing up the tree…"

 _Julia turned around immediately. "Kensi be careful, please get down."_

" _I'm fine Mom."_

" _She's going to hurt herself." Julia said softly just for Donald to here._

 _Kensi was happily climbing the tree trying to go higher. She was reaching for another branch when it broke off and her foot lost its grip against the tree, sending her to the ground landing on her side. "Kensi!" Julia started running towards her._

Donald started running as well so the view of the camera was of the ground but you could hear their voices.

" _Auw!" Kensi's said painfully._

" _Where does it hurt?" Julia's voice could be heard._

" _My arm."_

" _Can you move it at all?" The camera was now placed on the ground facing away from them._

" _No, it hurts too much." Her voice was quivering, on the verge of tears. "No Daddy!"_

" _I'm not going to do anything." He reassured her. "I don't think it's broken but we need to go the hospital to check."_

" _Let me help you up." Julia said._

" _I think her shoulder is dislocated."_

" _Let's hope nothing's broken." She stated. "I got her."_

 _The camera got lifted off the ground but was facing down at the grass. "It was filming this whole time…"_

The video now showed a room with white walls.

 _Kensi was sitting on a hospital bed and had her arm in a sling. She was talking to Julia softly as they seemed to be waiting._

" _We're at the hospital. They did some x-rays, no broken bones but she dislocated her shoulder." Kensi did a thumbs up towards the camera with her good arm. "How are you feeling Kens?"_

" _I'm okay."_

" _Such an adventurous one."_

" _Too adventurous." Julia looked annoyed but then softened her voice. "Nothing's ever going to stop her." She moved Kensi's hair behind her ear._

" _Kensi, Kensi, Kensi, I thought it was you who came in." A man in doctor's clothes said as he entered the room._

" _It's me."_

" _You have got to stop climbing up trees."_

" _But it's fun."_

" _It's dangerous." He was checking the paperwork. "Last time I saw you, you had a broken wrist from falling off your bike because you were doing a trick." She just shrugged her shoulders. "Alright you're all set to go." Julia helped her off the bed. "Now, Kensi as much as I like talking to you, I don't want to see you back here again."_

" _I can't promise anything but I'll try."_

" _Thank you so much." Julia said._

The video stopped and it seemed like the real end of the tape so he went back over to the box and looked for a good title on the videos. "You just couldn't listen to your Mom." He laughed as he thought of little Kensi disobeying her Mother.

"Climbing trees was fun." That was all she said in her defense.

He picked a video and put it in the machine, without telling her what it was. He knew he wanted to see what the video with 07/29/1982 on it was all about. Once he pressed the start button another hospital room became clear but for a different reason.

" _Here she is." He walked closer to a tired-looking Julia who was holding a baby in her arms._

" _We've waited so long for you to be here." He whispered. "Little Kensi Marie Blye. You're about 8 hours old right now." He got even closer to the her and touched her cheek softly. "Born at 5:52am, weighing 6 pounds 2 ounces."_

" _Welcome to the world." Julia kissed her little cheek, causing Kensi to move slightly._

" _Hi baby girl." Donald said but she didn't open her eyes. "How are you doing Julia?" He focused on her._

" _I'm exhausted but I'm good, really good."_

" _How does it feel to be a Mommy?"_

 _She got the biggest smile on her face. "It's indescribable." She said not taking her eyes of Kensi. "I can't believe she's here."_

" _I know."_

" _Do you want to hold her?"_

" _Yeah."_

The video went black but then started up again right away.

 _Donald was sitting on a chair with Kensi in his arms. Julia was the one filming now and she zoomed in on the two of them._

" _Now I have a question for you. How does it feel to be a Daddy?" The smile evident in her voice as she spoke._

 _Donald looked up smiling at Julia. "It's amazing." He turned his attention back to Kensi. "I'm going to be the best Dad that I can be. I already love you so so much." He was moving his finger along her cheek._

 _There was a silence between them as he took in Kensi's presence. "You have the most beautiful little eyes, the most adorable little nose and the most precious little hands." He held his finger next to her hand and she wrapped her tiny hand around his finger. "You're perfect." He whispered._

" _I'll keep you safe. I'm going to scare away all the boys so that you'll always stay Daddy's baby girl." He chuckled to himself but Julia also laughed softly. "Don't worry, when you meet the right guy and I approve of him, I'll gladly walk you down the aisle."_

She couldn't keep the tears away as she listened to her Dad's words. He wasn't going to have the opportunity to walk her down the aisle next week, he hadn't even been able to meet Deeks. She knows her Dad would have loved him even if he would have commented on his hair but the thought of that made her smile through the tears.

 _Kensi sneezed a small sneeze and Donald jumped slightly. "Oh, are you going to be a rebellious teen? No, no you're not. You're going to listen to your Daddy aren't you? Daddy always knows best."_

 _He was absolutely in awe looking at his baby Kensi. Kissing her forehead, something came to mind. "I got you a little bear." He reached into the bag that was next to him and pulled it out. He held it in front of her and then lightly touched her cheek with it. It was small, soft and adorable, perfect for her little hands. "I love you so much baby girl."_

Deeks saw the happy childhood she was living, up until it all fell apart. He never had the loving father she had. The Dad that taught her things, wanted her to succeed and gave her love and support. He knew that he himself would a have learned a lot from Kensi's father if he had been able to meet him but he vouched to himself that he would, or at least try, to live up to his standards and be the best father to his and Kensi's children one day. He saw how she tried to wipe away her tears but it didn't seem to stop more from falling. "Are you okay?" He put his hand on her knee.

"Yeah… I'm good." She really was, she was emotional when she saw her father but just loved hearing his voice again.

"You wanna stop watching?"

She shook her head. "No." He watched a thousand emotions cross over her face but decided to let it go.

He walked over to the box looking for another tape when he found something that could maybe help them. "Kensi's 15th birthday. We should watch the video. Does he give it to you on camera?" She shrugged her shoulders. She didn't remember what her Dad had filmed on her birthday or if he gave her the necklace when he was filming. He took the tape out of the box and put it in the machine and it started up right away.

 _The room was dark as Donald entered. "Kensi." He said in a soft voice. "It's a special day today." Kensi groaned sleepily. "It's time to wake up. We've got a birthday to celebrate." She laughed and sat up. "I've made your favorite breakfast, chocolate chip pancakes." Kensi had the brightest smile. "Happy 15th birthday baby girl."_

 _She got out of bed and walked towards her Dad. "Thanks." He followed her down the stairs and to the kitchen where her breakfast was already put on the table ready for her to eat and a pile of presents beside it._

" _I think all these presents are for me. Don't you think?" He asked cheesily and Kensi rolled her eyes, she was too old for those kinds of jokes but she still laughed. "You can open them after we eat."_

" _Okay." She sat down and started eating immediately._

The video stopped playing and they waited hoping it would continue again. The blue screen turned back to Kensi now finished with her breakfast.

" _Alright, I think you should start with the biggest box." She started ripping the paper off and took the lid of the box. It was a pair of brown boots._

" _I hope they fit, I know your other ones are too small. You can wear them on our camping trip next week."_

 _She pulled them out of the box right away and put them on. "They're perfect Dad!" She walked through the kitchen testing them out._

" _I'm glad. You can open the smaller package closest to you." She sat back down with her boots still on and unwrapped the gift._

" _It's the one I wanted. How did you know?" It was a virtual Tamagotchi pet._

" _Lucky guess." He laughed._

" _It's so cool."_

" _Alright open the next one closest to you."_

 _She opened it and read the title. "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone."_

" _The guy at the bookstore said it's popular so..."_

" _I think I've heard of it."_

" _Okay last present." It was the smallest present out of all of them and it had a bow on top of the paper. "Now this is something I bought for you right after your mom and I found out we were having a girl. So I've had it since before you were born." She unwrapped it and opened the box. It was a necklace with a silver chain and a small red and pinkish rhinestone in the middle. "It's your birthstone, which now that I come to think of it, was risky because you were born on the 29th. Two days before the month was over."_

 _Kensi laughed. "I love it."_

" _Turn it over and read the back."_

" _To my Baby Girl." Kensi smiled._

" _I'll help you put it on. Let me put the camera on the tripod." He attached it and walked over to Kensi. She was working on getting the necklace out of the little box and when she did, she gave it to him and moved her hair to the side. He put the it around her neck and attached the clasp then moved her hair back into place and started to speak again. "My baby girl's growing up."_

" _You say that every year." Kensi giggled and got up and gave him a hug._

" _Cause it's true."_

" _Thanks Dad."_

" _Your welcome sweetheart." They pulled apart and he walked back over to the camera. "Alright, time for…"_

And then the video was done. He looked over at her and she was just staring at the black screen with her eyes glazed over. He didn't want to startle her so he spoke softly. "When was the last time you got the necklace out?"

"I don't know. I don't remember." She was so frustrated all she remembered was that she kept it in the small jewelry box and that it's not there now.

"I know how much you want to find it but the necklace doesn't represent your Dad, Kens. You represent him with everything you do. With how you handle situations, how you enjoy being outdoors, how you crave your sugary snacks… and how you love." He moved a strand of hair out of her face. "He helped shape you into the beautiful woman you are today. The one I get to marry in a week." She smiled teary eyed. "And I will forever be grateful for that."

"I love you so much." She whispered.

"I love you too." He whispered back. Deeks was right the necklace is just an object and her father is so much more than that, he's more than just a memory. He was part of everything she did and always in her thoughts. She knew that he was smiling down at her, proud that she had found Deeks. He's an amazing man and he's going to be an amazing husband. Through all the tragedies, setbacks and heartbreaks, she has become an even stronger woman than she was before and she can honestly say that she has found true happiness in life. She couldn't wait to see what the next step would bring but with Deeks by her side, she knew she would be okay.

* * *

Thanks for reading!

This started out with just one video and then grew into way more. I took most of the stories from things that happened in episodes 1x15 The Bank Job, 8x3 Belly of the Beast, 8x4 The Queen's Gambit, 3x16 Blye, K. and 3x17 Blye, K. part 2.

There were some awards on Julia's shelves and they reminded me of awards you would get at horse riding competitions, there were also some horse figures so that's what I went with. I also looked up some trends that happened in the years of some of the flashbacks so hopefully it's correct. I tried to research things but I'm sorry if there are mistakes.

It switches to different videos so I hope it wasn't too confusing. If there are spelling mistakes in Kensi's speech when she's young it's intentional otherwise I just spelled it wrong hahaha.

For the flashbacks I tried to write it as if you were only watching it so you don't really know what they're thinking, but for the present you do.

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as enjoyed writing it! :)


End file.
